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“I picked the wrong business to have a mental illness and go into. I’m one of the most insecure and sad people ever, and I picked the most insecure, sad business to go into,” Davidson said.
Pete Davidson is coming clean, and not only from his tattoos.
The comedian — who made his debut on Saturday Night Live in 2014 — opened up about watching his audition tape for the sketch show and how it made him cry.
“The innocence in my eyes made me so sad,” Davidson told Page Six. “Showbiz is so tough, and I didn’t know how tough it was.”
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The audition footage is used in Peacock’s Beyond Saturday Night docu-series, which was released in the lead up to SNL50: The Anniversary Celebration, airing live on NBC and Peacock at 8 p.m. Sunday, Feb. 16.
The then 20-year-old auditionee was completely unaware of how his entire life would change as he stood on the iconic SNL stage in a red Spiderman T-shirt from Target. Now, the 31-year-old — who has been vocal about his mental health — shared how much he suffered internally while being in the limelight.
“I picked the wrong business to have a mental illness and go into. I’m one of the most insecure and sad people ever, and I picked the most insecure, sad business to go into,” Davidson said candidly.
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The King of Staten Island star has been to rehab seven times — seeking help for his drug use — and has dealt with diagnoses of borderline personality disorder and PTSD.
In his early days on SNL, Davidson revealed he had a “hard time fitting in” due to the rest of the cast and crew being older than him and in a different chapter of life.
“They were getting married, having kids and I was like, ‘Do you guys want to come over to play video games?!’ So I hung out with Lorne [Michaels],” he explained.
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Michaels — who created SNL — clearly saw something in Davidson from the beginning.
“Lorne told me, ‘I’m not really sure what to do with you, but I know you should be here,” Davidson recalled. “And it was life changing. I owe him my entire career and I love the guy. He’s one of my closest friends.”
Davidson was one of the Michaels’ youngest castings for the show, with Davidson saying he looked at him like his own “Tony Soprano,” as the SNL creator reassured him that he belonged on that stage.
“I’m his Christopher Moltisanti. One day he might kill me — and it would be worth it!”
Davidson will head back to the stage he started on — along with many other big name SNL alums — on for this weekend’s SNL50: The Anniversary Celebration.
